My mom told me today she has facebook. I looked her up and noticed she has 9 friends.
She has her friends in two groups, Flower People, and Shadow People. The Flower People are her friends who have flowers for pictures, and Shadow People are her friends who haven’t changed their default pictures.
Now I know why my mom has said “Just talking to the Shadow People” she meant it… I think…
Dear Government,
Hey! You might not remember me, but I’m a total fan of yours! I voted for you in the last election and everything. Well, that’s not entirely true, I struck my ballot, but I took part in the system. Yay Democracy!
Anyway, I’m writing you with something of a concern. I know I haven’t written in a while, and it seems low to just be contacting you with a favor to ask, but here it goes.
I need money.
There, I said it, it’s out there. Please, before you shred and burn this letter, please hear me out.
I recently got my tax return information in the mail, and I think one of your people made an error, because according to all this paperwork, I’m not really /that/ poor. Oh don’t get me wrong, I’m super poor, but it seems like I’m not poor /enough/ to get the refund I’ve been getting used to.
To be honest, I considered not filing this year, but then I heard about what you did to Jimmy Craige from down the road last year when he didn’t file. I’m not going to lie Government, I never suspected you to be the kind of person to ‘rape everything [Jimmy] owns’. Really, Dude, low.
Anyway, like I said, I need some cash. I’ve had things I had to buy this year and didn’t save as much as I’d like. A Car, tires for my car… The Dark Knight came out, I saw that like 10 times. So really, Government, any chance I can catch a break this year?
Thanks in advance,
Joe
